Friday, December 31, 2010

A Corny Star Wars Fanfic

...because, no, I don't have anything better to do...

As you probably don't know, one of my favorite things to do is writing long-winded comments on facebook in the form of fan-fictional blurbs. Since my camera is currently broken and I'm unable to upload new content from the real world, here's something from my archives. 

The Sith agent was close. Too close. James knew that if he failed to act now, the advantage gained by splashing water on the Sith's new black robe would be lost. He backed towards the wall, looked carefully around the corner, and listened.

"Damn! My new black robe!" his adversary shouted, trying in vain to wring the tepid water from his new black robe.

Checking his cornsaber's power gauge, he found it nearly drained. The fight with the mecha-tiger must have been more intense than he, or the mecha-tiger, remembered. Nevertheless, he made his move.

Unsheathing his cornsaber from its dried husk, he leaped into the corridor, taking the Sith by surprise. Dodging several blaster bolts and deflecting as many more with the cortosis-infused kernels of his weapon, he made his way slowly towards his foe.

Seconds later, the duel was ended. The Sith agent was sprawled on the floor, the lightly seasoned cornsaber protruding from his chest.

James, panting, said to the dying Sith, "I think you'll agree that it was EAR-responsible to take me on. And I hope the maintenance droids are hungry for CORPSE-on-the-cob," he turned. Walked away. 

"Because, that's what they're having."


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